Location: Husband Crime Lair Kitchenette
Description: Suspect did not purchase a single jar of jelly during enormous, awe-inspiring shopping trip totaling $214.00 because everyone was f'ing starving. The Mt. Olympus of groceries did not include a single, solitary jar and Victim specifically "reminded you to get jelly. It's the only thing I asked you to get."
Verdict: GUILTY
Punishment: 2 episodes of "Real Housewives of Jersey" (Fate worse than death)
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